Saturday, May 22, 2010

Uh Huh, Really?!

So in my quest to figure out where our little one whom God has destined to become a part of our family is located, I have researched and emailed and ... well, you name it. Today I received an email back from one agency that I saw worked with the country I'm interested in, and I had asked them about available HIV + children. Here's the response I received (italics are mine, for emphasis)...
I do work with an orphanage that has many HIV children. I am going (there) next month to find out and possibly take some pictures. I also need to make sure that you have done all your homework on this and that you understand all of the complications that come with an HIV child. The medicine is very expensive and most not covered by your insurance.

At first I laughed, I mean, really, ME do my homework. But then I really took in what she was saying, and thought about the fact that if it WERE someone who was just beginning to look into HIV+ children, this was NOT what I would want them reading, it is SO misleading and just plain WRONG.

Seriously, I understand striving to be sure a family has considered whatever they put on an adoption application as "acceptable" to them, but the "complications" that come with an HIV child??? Complications? You mean complications like having to give a few meds every 12 hours? Oooo... that's a hard one to deal with for sure! :) Would they phrase things in such a way to someone who said they were open to adopting a child with limb differences, or spina bifida, or asthma? Complications? I'm just floored.

And the bit about insurance? Most insurances DO cover meds! Yes, you would still have your copay, but if you have a prescription program, you should be ok. AND, even if you weren't, there are many state programs in place for those with HIV to get help paying for meds.

I'm just really floored that an adoption agency, trying to advocate for children, would put things in such a way. Wow! What an eye-opener! She WILL be getting an email back from me! Count on it! And no, I won't be working with that agency!


Molly said...

I just signed up to help coordinate and fundraiser for an HIV orphanage in eastern europe.
That letter is NOT encouraging. When I first read it I laughed. Because if anyone has done her homework it's you.

but to say that to someone who is teatering on the edge of adoption? That's discouraging. Lets give people the FACTS, not myths.

annieglan said...

I think a lot of people who go into adoption think I am going to do this to "save" a child. I think that's where she was coming from. (Not that HIV children don't deserve a family). I'm sure she didn't know about Olivia. I don't think she meant any harm. And I know when we were looking at international adoption you had to check to see if your insurance would cover "pre-existing" conditions, so my guess is that a lot of insurance companies don't. Some families can't handle RAD, some can't handle autism, and some can't handle HIV. Every family is different.

I am not saying she is right in her email. I am just trying to open up another point of view :) I hope I could help.

Holly said...

oh my goodness. Please....let her know. EDUCATION is KEY to getting over all the ignorance and stigma!
Thanks for sharing Lisa!

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About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

Liam - 9

Macy - 5

Macy - 5

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What you should know about HIV

-HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. Additional information on transmission of HIV can be found on the Center for Disease Control website:

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Orphan Crisis

• 147 million orphans in the world
• 50 million orphans in Africa 
• Every 14 seconds a child is orphaned by AIDS
• 16,000,000 have been orphaned by AIDS
• Every week, AIDS claims as many lives as American fatalities in the Vietnam War
• 854 million people do not have enough to eat
• Malnutrition is associated with the deaths of 5 million children under the age of five
• Every 2 seconds an orphan dies from malnutrition

Hence the title of my blog

Little Did I Know

Little did I know that the road would be so rocky
Little did I know that the trip would take so long
Little did I know that my heart could hurt so much
Little did I know that God is never wrong

Little did I know that love could be so powerful
Little did I know that a dream so far could go
Little did I know that God would place the right ones
Little did I know that my heart, so large, could grow

Little did I know that a dream has it’s own timing
Little did I know that this day would finally come
Little did I know that four souls would be sent to guide me
Little did I know that they would choose to call me mom

But God knew all along and He had a plan to follow
God knew all along that my dream would soon come true
God knew all along that we five should be together
God knew all along that I’d share it all with you