Saturday, May 01, 2010

Caught in a Tornado

Wow. For those of you who have adopted, I give you credit. Having adopted strictly through the foster care system I didn't have the whirlwind of decisions to make regarding agency, country, cost, need... it feels like I'm caught in a tornado of decision and I don't know which way to turn or which direction is up anymore. I've been frantically asking questions, but things aren't coming out right, and I don't even know where to begin. What a process!

Now that I feel God's leading toward another, out of foster care, adoption, it's hard to process all of the need, all of the options, all of the decisions there truly are. I know I am stepping out in faith, and I know that God will provide, but there is still that part of me that longs for control, that sees a "cost" of $28,000 and gasps. For how on earth could I ever afford that. But, that's just it isn't it, I couldn't (on earth) ever afford it, but if I am truly step out in faith, then I am trusting HIM to provide it. And then my mind whispers, wouldn't it be easier for Him to provide $13,000??? Why $28,000??? And around and around the whirlwind takes me.

Last night I rented Facing the Giants. I knew nothing of this movie, but saw it in the Redbox and took a chance. LOVED it. Loved the lesson on faith. Loved the lesson on praising God, win or lose. Loved the teaching of trusting Him to meet our needs. And it was just what I needed to begin to calm the storm raging within. To begin to slow the whirlwind, and allow God to speak. To trust that I need to keep following, not worry about the research right now, and just believe that He has me on the path He has created. I know He has a child in mind for us. I believe that He will reveal the pieces when they need to be revealed. We won't "miss out". And I choose to trust that the money will not be an issue. I will follow.


Molly said...

I assume you've seen the Reece's Rainbow website? if not it's It's all kids with special needs, like DS, HIV, etc. There are some gorgeous baby muffins on there! and I have seen time and time again the miracles that happen. I've seen families raise $25,000 SO many times, even when it seems impossible. Plus there are grants.

hitchhiker said...

I think DOMESTIC adoption - baby girl!

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About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

Liam - 9

Macy - 5

Macy - 5

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What you should know about HIV

-HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. Additional information on transmission of HIV can be found on the Center for Disease Control website:

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Orphan Crisis

• 147 million orphans in the world
• 50 million orphans in Africa 
• Every 14 seconds a child is orphaned by AIDS
• 16,000,000 have been orphaned by AIDS
• Every week, AIDS claims as many lives as American fatalities in the Vietnam War
• 854 million people do not have enough to eat
• Malnutrition is associated with the deaths of 5 million children under the age of five
• Every 2 seconds an orphan dies from malnutrition

Hence the title of my blog

Little Did I Know

Little did I know that the road would be so rocky
Little did I know that the trip would take so long
Little did I know that my heart could hurt so much
Little did I know that God is never wrong

Little did I know that love could be so powerful
Little did I know that a dream so far could go
Little did I know that God would place the right ones
Little did I know that my heart, so large, could grow

Little did I know that a dream has it’s own timing
Little did I know that this day would finally come
Little did I know that four souls would be sent to guide me
Little did I know that they would choose to call me mom

But God knew all along and He had a plan to follow
God knew all along that my dream would soon come true
God knew all along that we five should be together
God knew all along that I’d share it all with you