Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Can You Say Disaster?!

Well, Braeden started taekwondo tonight.

I have tried to find a sport or something to interest him, something he could get "into" and focus on and get excited about. Olivia has done gymnastics, swimming, cheerleading, and she will be doing dance this year. (Only dance, we "gave up" the rest and she picked dance as her ONE thing for the year.) Braeden tried gymnastics and made it through two or three classes. I spent the class time running after him. He is just so head strong and independent and wants to do what he wants to do when he wants to do it. He did not want to wait his turn or would want to do something across the room instead of what they were doing. It was embarrassing I must admit. Then we tried swimming. He LOVES to swim and is fearless in the water, to the point of being scary. Same results. He just could not sit still on the wall and wait for his turn to go across the pool. We did one class session of 6 weeks.

So, I waited a while and have heard lots of good things about karate being helpful for kids who are hyperactive and in need of structure. We have a program that is pricey, but you can sign up through the park district for an 8 week session for a great price. I thought that would be a good way to see how he did, and then we could sign up fully if it was beneficial to him. You can do 3 park dist sessions before you have to make a commitment. It is 2, 30minute sessions per week.

Today was his first day.

Disaster would be the appropriate word.

The "Master", Master C told me when he was filling out our form and getting his uniform that once he "entered" the class Braeden "was his." I asked if that meant that if he was out of control I was not to step in, and he said yes. I had talked to him on the phone prior about Braeden's need for structure and how the class worked, and my wanting to make sure he would do this before our full commitment, etc. Out of the 17 kids ages 3- maybe 8, Braeden was THE ONLY ONE acting up. He did the first one minute or so of class (I'm not exaggerating), then was growling (as a lion) at Master C, fooling around, rolling around, etc. He would NOT participate. Every now and then he would look at me and say "Hi mommy!" and wave as if he was the lead in a play or something. I tried to just ignore him and let "C" handle it. He had to practically sit on him during the class. At one point he told C he needed to tell me something. I said it was time for class and he needed to get back to class with the rest. He was bawling. I felt so bad, but knew if I hugged and coddled him now we'd never get past that and he would get attention for what he was doing. It was so hard.

But, I was more saddened to think of what his future in school, etc could look like if he isn't able to get past "this". Not so much taekwondo, but just being able to be socially appropriate when needed. He is one of the smartest kids I know, and I'm not just saying that. He remembers everything and comprehends so much. But I foresee him being labled a troublemaker and "one of those ADHD kids" by teachers unwilling to take the time to get to know him. I think that was the problem with his preschool this year. He hated it. And while I am not a parent who just takes my kids words at face value and blames everyone else, I really don't think his teacher got to know him. I think he was bored. I worry he won't learn and be challenged and will end up hating school. I am so worried for him.

After the class C came up to me and said that it will take him about 3-4 classes but that he should come around. I certainly hope so. If C is willing to keep at it, then I will keep bringing him. I want Braeden to be successful. I want him to see that he can have fun and be interested in something while following the rules and doing what is needed to do. I know God will do wonderful things through him.

Here he is before class started. He was so excited and proud of his uniform.


And here he is once we got out to "the bus" and mom had to talk to him a bit.


I talked about how sad I was that he wouldn't listen to his instructor and that I knew he was such a smart boy and could do all of the things the other kids were doing but I didn't get to see him doing those things. He seemed pretty sad about it. I hope it helped and that Thursday, his next class, will go better. It doesn't help that after the first four classes we'll be gone for the next two on our trip.

6 comments:

Torina said...

I've BTDT with Tara and karate. Oh my. Talk about stressful. It is hard to find that thing that fits...but keep on trying and it'll happen. For Tara, it is volunteering at the nursing home for Bingo hour. That is her thing. She can flit around and ramble on to the old folks, look cute, and they are all so old that none of them can hear her jabber on about things that make no sense at all. And man! Can that girl play bingo!

If anything, you will get some really cute pictures and fun memories for when Braeden gets older. That is priceless. He will find his thing. You are a great mom who is giving him lots of opportunities to explore his options. That is what he will remember when he gets older.

Brandi said...

OH my! I can so see one of my littls struggling like that. . it'd be so hard to watch! Way to go, mom! Sit on those sidelines and don't step in. . .you're doing the right thing!

See you soon,
Brandi

Kathy said...

I can picture Destiny being the same way, and I feel for both you and Braeden.

You're doing a wonderful thing, helping him to find something he will enjoy and that will enrich his life...and hanging in there through all of it.

Julie said...

Awww- that is not fun- I hope he can learn to follow directions- it is hard for hyper kids- but i hear karate and the like are great for them.

I forget- what trip do you have left this summer Rockstar?

Horray for the instructor who doesn't just rule him out! This will be good for him. It doesn't feel like it today, but it will!

Unknown said...

I have a little one like this too, What a great instructor for making sure you knew he coulk take it!

Once he gets used to it I am sure he will love it!

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I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!


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