Friday, September 24, 2010
Prayers
We could use some prayers right now. Lots going on seemingly all at once.
The puppy is absolutely wonderful! He is doing so well! But he is a puppy and does require home time and letting out time and cleaning up poop time. :) He's great though!
Braeden's rages have continued. One bad day last week at church and a really really rough night at home last night. I can handle the tantrums and rages, but the things coming out of his mouth hit straight to the heart. I tried "holding" him last night in a type of restraint technique but it wasn't working and progressed to a full out restraint until he could control himself. He was facing away from me and tears were just silently streaming down my cheeks as I listened to the words he was yelling at me. It hit hard. I "know" it's not personal in that moment, I "get" that it's coming from somewhere else, but it's hard. Hard and ugly and not the "Oh aren't you wonderful" mothering moment so many think you have because you're a "sainted adoptive parent", nope, this is reality.
But the hardest of all was tonight at dinner. Way "back when" when Olivia's seizures began, it started with one or both of her legs basically "falling asleep." She couldn't move them. It was almost always at night and/or when she was extremely tired, so even though I tried talking to her doctors about it, they passed it off as psychological due to her past. I thought different but there wasn't much to do at that point. Then her "fall out of bed full out shaking" seizure hit and there it was, laid out plain as day. We set up a neuro appt asap and before we were even home they called in a prescription due to her results and not wanting to wait. Since then she has been seizure free. But this past summer her seizure med was slightly reduced and another added due to low neutrophil counts, possibly caused by that or one of her other meds. Tonight at dinner her legs were shaking and then fell asleep for 3-4 minutes. She was scared to death poor thing. I just stayed by her and talked to her about how she was fine and not hurt and it would pass. She couldn't feel me tickling the bottoms of her feet or pinching her feet or calves. Scary. Especially because she knows what this led to last time. We have a neuro appt already on Oct 7 so I'll call Mon but I doubt they'll have us come early unless she were to have a full out seizure.
As I said, we could really use your added prayers. Thank you!
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Olivia - 14
Braeden - 11
Liam - 9
Macy - 5
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5 years ago
5 comments:
Praying for healing for both of your sweet ones. I'm no expert, but I remember my son going through a phase like this. It seemed like he had "hurts" bottled up inside that needed to come out and he always took it out on me. I think they take it out on us because they feel safe and they know that our love is unconditional. Maybe B is gathering stressful situations at school with new year, new class, new teacher, new material, new friends and so he let's it out at home. I know that people who have turets (sorry for my spelling) can go all day at school without ticking but then they tick like crazy when they get home because they have to let it all out.
Lisa, you are an incredible mama. You are doing an awesome job. I will also pray for God to fill the doctors with wisdom.
Sending hugs!
Amy
Praying for you all... I really appreciate your honesty on the blog a a future foster/adopt mom. I can't wait to have my on kiddo and to ask you for advice :)
You are in my prayers!! As you know, we're in the process of adopting, and it is so refreshing to read REAL posts about REAL situations. Sometimes i find myself thinking everything is going to be PERFECT and there won't be any issues.... sometimes I forget these little ones are coming to us with real hurt and real pain. It won't always be perfect. Thank you for keeping it real on your blog. Praying for you and for the doctors to have wisdom in this situation.
Praying for you all.
I'm praying. (((HUGS)))