Thursday, May 05, 2011

Unexpected Blessings

As I said in my last post, we're struggling. Braeden's ADHD meds are not working. To recap, you can read some of our prior struggle HERE.

After this, we had a few good months. In April, we began seeing more activity yet again. I wasn't worried about it at home, but when his teacher reported that he was becoming more and more active in the classroom, interrupting his learning, I grew concerned once again.

April 18 Braeden had his next doctor appointment and I shared his growing activity level. His meds were upped. And things spiraled downhill. By the following week, Braeden was beginning daily trips to the principal's office. Tuesday he was in the office for about 20 minutes, Wednesday there were two of these such office visits, and on Thursday it hit the fan. A full-blown rage such as we had known back in the fall at home. After 40 minutes of being restrained by both the principal and school social worker, they called me (I work in the same district at a separate building.) It was almost lunch and I ran over to see what I could do. He had been raging almost an hour and I "took over." It lasted another hour and a half. During that time the social worker and I talked. This couldn't continue and was out of control. I agreed. I had already tried calling his doctor, who is only in our area on Mondays. They weren't answering and the voice mail box was full. I didn't know when or if I'd get a hold of them or what they could do. We talked about having someone from the hospital come to evaluate or head to ER to do an eval there.

I could not believe we were looking at admitting him to an inpatient program. The day program had a 2-3 week wait list and there was no way this could continue as is. My concern with taking him to ER was that I was 99% sure that once we left the school and the audience, got into a new environment, he'd be fine by the time we arrived. So she had the hospital/school liason come to observe him. I was and am glad. I really liked what I saw in her. She was able to get a good picture of him in the middle of a rage and also after it was over. We discussed our roller coaster of meds, etc and she agreed that it was a med issue and that admitting him would be good to get a handle on the meds. She called the doctor who works on the ward, no beds were available.

We decided I'd take off Friday in case I was needed again, but we'd leave his day as is without him knowing I was home, we'd bring his meds back down to where they were (the ADHD one), and continue to see if I could get a hold of the doctor, etc. He did great Friday, he did great all weekend, and I had an appt for Monday. Monday they called to say he wouldn't be in and could I see him next Monday. Ummmm..... NO! So I took off of work Tuesday to drive him up north to where he was seeing patients that day. And the doctor refused to change his meds. Said that he believed Focalin was THE med for him, that it helped his ADHD and that we would keep things status quo until summer when we would adjust and try again, with the same meds.

Wednesday was from H**l. Course I didn't know this until I nonchalantly stopped by his room at the end of the day to see how his day was as I was at his building for a meeting. He had had a sub and the reading teacher who is usually in his room (and he butts heads with) proceeded to tell me that when he does whatever he wants and nothing is done then he's fine. I was floored. Basically they allowed him to spew horrible things at the two teachers in the room, roll around on the floor instead of doing work, etc and there were no consequences, no note home to me, nothing. So if I hadn't stopped by I wouldn't have even known this had happened to talk to him or anything else. And he came to me later thrilled because he was "on green" which was basically a warning. We ate dinner and went to church where the behavior continued. Three adults had him in a room and came to get me from my class. I stayed in the room with his back and forth behavior (they were having a party being the last day, and he wanted to participate in the fun stuff) until Olivia was done. I had to practically man handle him to get him to the car.

A great, new friend through church saw us on the way out and later tried calling. I didn't answer because I had just gotten the kids to bed and didn't want him to hear me on the phone. Truthfully I was also afraid right then of talking and trusting my voice as it was a rough few hours. She asked about bringing over dinner to us tonight to help out and have one less thing for me to worry about. Wow. I've never had people offer to help in such a way. I was floored. I thanked her and agreed and tonight we had a wonderful pizza dinner, with plenty to spare for lunches for a while too! :)

But she really floored me when she announced that dinner was taken care of for tomorrow and a few days each of the next few weeks. WHAT!? She said she'd drop off a schedule for me. Oh. My. I about lost it. I could NOT believe it! I know tomorrow her mom is bringing dinner and am not even sure who else is helping, but what an amazing amazing thing they are doing for us. I am just in awe. So humbled.

I look forward to spending this extra time in prayer, with the kids, and hopefully figuring out what is going on with Braeden.

Today I again called the liason for the school/hospital. I do NOT want to admit my seven year old to an inpatient ward with teens. I don't. BUT, his doctor is not doing what he needs to do to help my son. He even admitted he believes the behavior is due to the meds. But he won't change it. If I can get Braeden in a secure setting for a few days to a week where they can really work on WHAT is going on and find what WORKS for HIM, then in the long run I believe this is now my only option. She has not called me back yet but I do know she got my message and I'm hoping to hear from her tomorrow and see what she thinks.

I appreciate all of the wonderful comments and support! Thank you for keeping us in your prayers!


Kathy C. said...

It really sounds like more than ADHD. The raging shouldn't be caused by the meds. My aspergers child rages. He's on concerta and tenex for ADHD but nothing to do for aspergers. My other ADhd is on the daytrana patch and just 2.5 focalin to jump start the patch in the morning.

Can you get some video tape so perhaps someone else can see what's happening.

And I agree they shouldn't just let him do what he wants. Kaleb's preschool teacher did that last year because it was easier than dealing with him, but I told her she wasn't doing his future kindergarten teacher any favors!

Jeanie said...

Prayers for you all. The situation must be horrendous for all of you.

Julie said...

Praying for you lisa! Hang in there- God is bigger that this!! He is watching!

prating things get sorted out soon Lisa!

Praying! I am glad someone helped you with meals for a while. I wish I lived close enough to roll up my sleeves and help you.

Praying for healing and strength.

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About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

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