Friday, October 01, 2010

A New Normal

It's funny isn't it... how things you maybe never even considered for your life; good, bad, or otherwise can become "normal" to you. After all, "normal" is so relative.

Would I have ever in my life thought it "normal" to live with a child with HIV, or seizures, or ADHD, let alone 3 children who share all of these and more? Or could you ever think it "normal" to live the life of a foster parent, where one minute you are a single woman making plans with friends and the next you're taking a call for a 3 day old baby to be dropped off at your home in a matter of hours? Or is "normal" waking one day to find that your nine year old child, who takes dance, and rides bikes, and runs and plays, all of sudden can't walk anymore, can't stand up, needs to be dressed and taken to the bathroom and helped into bed?

This is slowly becoming our new normal. My arms are beginning to ache with the daily carrying of my lovely 62 pound girl. (Crazy to think that I've lost more weight than that and it's so hard to carry her!) My mind reels with what to tell the doctors the next time I talk to them. I am beginning to think of next week and the next and how to now figure out a rehearsal dinner that begins at 7pm, when she is most likely completely devoid of feeling in her legs. Of a wedding that she was to be my "date" for that doesn't start until 5, and how her legs with "start" during the ceremony, not to mention the reception. How every morning I now wake and plan my time according to getting her out of bed and dressed and to and from each activity while still getting myself and the boys ready as well. How I don't know that we can go back to our Wednesday night church activities because Olivia can't walk let alone dance on the worship and dance "team." How I'm planning our nights at home because how would it look to carry a 9 year old around at the movie theater or a restaurant or a store or... And how this is becoming routine. How I'm not looking at days when this will be gone, because I don't have any hint that it is going away.

It's our new normal.

And I'm not sure I like it.

3 comments:

Molly said...

Blargh! I am sorry things are such a mess with her seizures right now!

You are a strong mama and your kids are SO lucky.

Ashley said...

Just want you to know that I pray for you and your kids every night. I will continue to do so and will be specific in asking for healing of Olivia's legs. I can't imagine how difficult it is for you to be going through so much with your kiddos right now, but I have a feeling this is a way you are being testing you as you continue on your journey to bringing another little one into your family. Continue trusting in God and he will get you through this too!

Christie said...

Ugh, wish I had some wisdom to give you. But, all I can do is pray and support you from afar.

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About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!


Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

Liam - 9

Macy - 5

Macy - 5

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What you should know about HIV

-HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. Additional information on transmission of HIV can be found on the Center for Disease Control website: http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources

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• 147 million orphans in the world
• 50 million orphans in Africa 
• Every 14 seconds a child is orphaned by AIDS
• 16,000,000 have been orphaned by AIDS
• Every week, AIDS claims as many lives as American fatalities in the Vietnam War
• 854 million people do not have enough to eat
• Malnutrition is associated with the deaths of 5 million children under the age of five
• Every 2 seconds an orphan dies from malnutrition


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Little Did I Know

Little did I know that the road would be so rocky
Little did I know that the trip would take so long
Little did I know that my heart could hurt so much
Little did I know that God is never wrong

Little did I know that love could be so powerful
Little did I know that a dream so far could go
Little did I know that God would place the right ones
Little did I know that my heart, so large, could grow

Little did I know that a dream has it’s own timing
Little did I know that this day would finally come
Little did I know that four souls would be sent to guide me
Little did I know that they would choose to call me mom

But God knew all along and He had a plan to follow
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God knew all along that we five should be together
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