Sunday, February 14, 2016

Being Right

Many people rule their lives it seems by always having to "be right."  They have to have the final say, can't open their mind to other points of view, choose not to look into another idea or solution, and will defend their concept or position to the death.

I admit that at times I can get caught up in that as much as anyone.  But I like to think that for the most part that is NOT how I choose to function.  Does that mean I won't defend myself if I believe that I'm on the right track with a student or that I will "back down" if a certain 14 year old doesn't remember that she was asked three times to do something that still has not been done, no. :)  But I always try to see others' perspectives, their way of looking at a problem, another way to complete a job or view a solution or see our world.

Being right can also be a tough place for many.  I am positive there are times that people find out information and then wish with all they have that they WEREN'T right.  When the crew on the Titantic realized that the unsinkable ship was going down and they needed to begin evacuation, there were many who still disagreed.  Many who would not listen, would not, could not, dare to believe that this majestic boat was really sinkable.  But those who began to help passengers to safety were right.  The Titanic WAS sinking, and as much as they most likely wished to be wrong, they were right.

Friday I took Olivia to meet with a neurologist at the same hospital we've been going to, to help look at getting answers to what has been, and is, going on with her.  The neurologist looked over all of the tests that were done and spoke with one of the doctors we've been working with.  This doctor, like the others, still doesn't want to admit that her recent episode is in any way related to Olivia's hospitalization over the summer.  Even though she had the exact same symptoms.  Even though she's never been through anything like this any other time.  Even though both times it took a spinal tap to end those symptoms.

And I'm pretty sure I know why.  I'm pretty sure I know what she has. 

This most recent appointment?  The doctor did at least confirm that this is something REAL.  That whatever is happening is NOT just "in her head."  So that's a positive.  However, she's still guessing at what it could be.  She gave us a possibility and asked me to research it at home.  Recommended we still move forward with our referral to the other hospital in April (WE WILL BE).  And dismissed, just like the other doctors, the condition that I think Olivia has.  Dismissed it because of ONE factor.  One factor that I had read does not have to be at the number that these doctors do.  Because Olivia's "number" was the high end but "normal".  And yet the guess she gave me... does not hardly fit AT ALL. 

Do I WANT to "be right?"  NO!  Believe me, this is NOT about being right.  I do NOT wish to be "right" on this.  If I thought in the least that this doctor's recommendation was spot on... I'd run with it.  Because what she thinks... no big deal.  Managable.  Common.  Treatable.  What I think it is... what I'm pretty darn SURE it is... Not easily managable.  Rare.  Hard to treat with some patients.  But it fits.  And I don't WANT to just jump onto another diagnosis because it was given by a doctor, or because it's "better".

Because I don't WANT to be right. 
But I know I am.
And I wait and watch and hope that Olivia doesn't relapse before SOMEone helps us.  Before SOME doctor is willing to look seriously at this and provide a strong plan and treatment.
And my days and nights are spent trying not to worry.  Trying to distract myself as much as I can.  And trying to find something else it could be so that I'm NOT right.

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About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

Liam - 9

Macy - 5

Macy - 5

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What you should know about HIV

-HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. Additional information on transmission of HIV can be found on the Center for Disease Control website:

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Orphan Crisis

• 147 million orphans in the world
• 50 million orphans in Africa 
• Every 14 seconds a child is orphaned by AIDS
• 16,000,000 have been orphaned by AIDS
• Every week, AIDS claims as many lives as American fatalities in the Vietnam War
• 854 million people do not have enough to eat
• Malnutrition is associated with the deaths of 5 million children under the age of five
• Every 2 seconds an orphan dies from malnutrition

Hence the title of my blog

Little Did I Know

Little did I know that the road would be so rocky
Little did I know that the trip would take so long
Little did I know that my heart could hurt so much
Little did I know that God is never wrong

Little did I know that love could be so powerful
Little did I know that a dream so far could go
Little did I know that God would place the right ones
Little did I know that my heart, so large, could grow

Little did I know that a dream has it’s own timing
Little did I know that this day would finally come
Little did I know that four souls would be sent to guide me
Little did I know that they would choose to call me mom

But God knew all along and He had a plan to follow
God knew all along that my dream would soon come true
God knew all along that we five should be together
God knew all along that I’d share it all with you