Friday, April 01, 2011

A Cocoon

OK, all you adoptive pros! Question for you!

I'm researching and planning for when that magical day comes and we are home as a family of FIVE. I'm planning on taking the maximum amount of time off of work that I can (assuming my tax refund comes through as it was supposed to - the tax-credit-turned-refund SHOULD garner a nice return, but it's up in the air right now) and spend LOTS of time with our new lovely. It will be great having all the one on one time during the day while the kids are at school and I want to do what I can to attach and bond.

I've been reading up on Cocooning...

Cocooning refers to pulling away a bit from the outside world and focusing your time and attention on your immediate family.

...and my question is... IF you did some type of cocooning with your newly adopted little one, what form did it take and how did it work for you? Did you attempt to stay at home for a certain period of time with no outside "trips"? Did that mean also the grocery store or just travel type things, or maybe anything with large crowds? How long did your cocooning last? One week? Two? A Month? More? How were your own children involved and how did it affect them while cocooning if you have other children?

I LOVE the idea and concept of cocooning! I love the thought of just focusing on the new little one in your home. Of wrapping them in your love, in God's love, in family. Of creating routine amid the chaos that is their life at that moment. Of allowing the newness of EVERYTHING to become somewhat commonplace before venturing out. Of helping them grow into a beautiful butterfly, ready to spread their wings and embrace the world.

And I know I don't need to create the wheel. So what worked? What would you do differently if you could? What do you think wasn't that big of a deal and could have been done differently?

Thanks EVER so much!


Amy said...

Hi Lisa, After returning from HK with Grant, we "cocooned". I actually didn't know that's what you call it, but it's certainly what we did. I acted as if I had just given birth when the doctor tells you to not go to public places for 6 weeks until the baby develops his immune system. We just stayed at home with the exception of walks around the neighborhood and to the park. I will say that after about 3 weeks, we would take short trips to the grocery store. I really just wanted to introduce him to everything gently and slowly. It was so good for bonding I can't even begin to describe how valuable this time was. We took a trip to see family after Christmas when he had been home for 6 weeks but we still made sure that either me or his daddy were in his line of sight at all times. I really think that this time boosted his confidence and helped him to understand that he was a part of our family. He understands "home" and who lives there and now seems very comfortable and secure with that.

:)De said...

Hey Lisa,

Sorry it took me a couple of days to answer. With my 1st child, he was so traumatized that I "cocooned" for almost 10 weeks. Like Amy said, I initially thought I would do the 6 weeks that they recommend for newborns, but I could tell right away that he was easily over-stimulated. At the time I was attending a very large church so we started going to the early service with less people and we started with only going for a short time, slipping in after all the movement of chiors, offering and such, leaving just before benediction and gradually worked up.

You will know as you meet her. Follow her lead and your gut.

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I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

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