Ok, I just talked with the cw. I guess it was the state itself that didn't publish or didn't publish for all involved parties. Whatever it was it was not the agency's fault. So I guess that's good, but still, come on. Another month lapses in actual people's lives...

Well. The intern came for the home visit yesterday and after not hearing back from the cw, I was about jumping down his throat for info on J's termination. Well, ok, not really, but he was in the house not two min before I asked if the cw had given him the info on what happened at court.

Me: "So did **** tell you what happened at court today?"

Intern: "Oh, I was there with her! I can tell you!"

Me: "Do you have the dates? When is termination?"

Intern: "Well," with slight grin, or is that a grimace, "we don't have them yet."

Me: "What do you mean we don't have them yet?!"

Intern: "Because the info that need to be published in the paper trying to contact the bios never was published and we had to push the date back. It will be published tomorrow and then it will have been published for the necessary 30 days when the next court date happens on May 23."


Ahhhhhh!!!!

I really need that patience and understanding God! :)

Well, today is the day J's cw is supposed to go to court in order to have the termination dates scheduled. I'm waiting on pins and needles, hoping she will call when she has them in her datebook. I'm having a home visit today with the intern so maybe she will send the dates with him... but will she??? I just want to know!!! :)

In other news, on top of everything else that's going on right now: moving!!!, adoption plans, etc. I got into a car accident on Friday! My stupid fault, no one was hurt, their car hardly had anything but a couple scrapes on the bumper, but mine, well it sure looked ok the day of the crash. Must have had me fooled. We didn't see any damage that day, but Saturday I walked around the front to get B from the other side and happened to look down. There must have been a crack in the grill because it is now almost completely cracked in half and separating. The grill and headlight panel need to be replaced as well as the bumper touched up, though I'm not worried about that. And what is my deductable in all this, since I've only ever had one car accident in my life, and didn't think it needed to be real low??? $500! May not seem like too very much, but in the midst of moving it's like a mountain that rose up out of a molehill.

God, grant me patience and good stewardship over Your money right now! :)

Circus admission for three: $12

Three hot dogs, one bottled water, cotton candy, and two bags of peanuts: $12

Two bounce house tickets: $6

One pony ride: $4

J's face after riding the pony, and B's face when the elephants came in: Priceless!!!

J has had a few very cute comments lately in regards to adoption.

Like I said previously we do talk about it and it's a subject not put in hiding. Almost any time I'm reading a book she asks, "Is that about adopted?" I do read quite a few books on adoption, but not every one is! :)

Besides this, I also have one of the highly popular "rubber" bracelets. Mine is purple and white and says "Adoption = Love." She likes this bracelet and wants one for herself. I've shared with her how I've already ordered and received these for her, B, my parents, and the kids' Godparents when that day finally comes and the adoptions are final. A short time ago we were talking to someone about the adoption and I asked J to tell them what adoption will mean for us. Of course I expected her to say "We will be a forever family," or something like this that we talk about all the time. Oh no - instead she said "A bracelet!!!!" :) Too cute!

Prior to J coming to live with me she shared a bedroom with her brother. She has had issues with going to bed by herself which we have worked on the past year. I have seen this in a number of foster children I've had. They're still there though for J, even after one year. She sleeps with her comforter or blanket pulled over her head. Only once have I allowed her to sleep in the same bed as me, though she has asked a number of times. On that occasion she was very ill, her bed had been thrown up on, and I couldn't bring myself to completely make and clean her bed in the wee hours of the morning. I know it is a big no-no, with her being a foster child, but she did sleep in my bed that one night. Anyway, the other day J asked me, "When I'm adopted can I sleep in your bed???" We had such a "serious" discussion on how hard it is to sleep alone in a room and how after she's adopted if there are any really scary nights, especially with bad storms, then yes, she could probably sleep in my bed. :)

Well, as always seems to happen, we are having a bit of a delay getting into our new home. Just before spring break my realtor found out that the realtor for the people purchasing my home did not tell them I had found a house and had a signed contract, so they had not started their loan info. He declares she never told him, but I know better. Very frustrating. Due to this, it will be a two week delay. We are now looking at closing May 12. Since I am a teacher and had spring break last week, I had ordered online for one of those PODS to come last Monday. That way I could spend my spring break packing while the kiddos were at day care (with some time to take J to a movie, etc. thrown in.) I still went ahead because I just didn't know when else I would be able to get all the packing done. Moving with the POD will be so much easier. I just hate asking for help, and this way I can pack it all myself and ask for friends to come help unload one afternoon after we move in. Unfortunately, right now I'm almost done filling the POD and am at the point where I don't think it will all fit. Life - oh well.

On the adoption front, B's paperwork is in progress. We still have not heard, however, if his bios appeal was formally denied. J's caseworker is doing his paperwork because B just got his fourth caseworker recently. There has been a lot of turnover as of late for some reason. So she's just going to do it. She came for a visit over break since she hadn't seen them for a while with a new intern doing most of the home visits lately. She asked for each of their "new" names to write on the paperwork, so it's pretty much a done deal with those! Very strange feeling.

J has been talking a lot lately about cutting her hair short. She's African American and has fairly long hair. She doesn't like getting it done. (We've done it a million different ways.) She also has a tendency to itch it a lot, making it very knotty. A friend of mine (who is African American) thinks we should go ahead. She thinks it will look cute as a little afro and then J could do it herself each morning. Someone from DCFS was here for a visit with J, the caseworker, and I last week and as I was asking the caseworker about this, since I can't just choose to get her hair cut myself!, the DCFS lady said that I should not let her cut it and that she is just too young to make that decision for herself. I think if that's what she really wants then she should be able to do that. It's not like she's asking to pierce her tongue! It's hair! It will grow again! :) The cutest thing was that when the caseworker asked J why she wanted her hair cut she didn't say anything about not liking it done, etc, she turned to me and said to me, "Because I want my hair short like yours mommy!" We talked later about how special that was to me but that she did need to understand that her hair would still not look just like mine because we have different hair. Hers would still be curly even though it was short, and mine is straight as a board. So - hair cutting??? - we'll see, but I think it would be cute!

Last year as I began to think of J beginning kindergarten next fall (2006) (could it be here so soon???) I began to think long term of my family, our location, school, and their potential friends. I like our current home. It's a two story, old house with lots of character, lots of original woodwork, and lots of room. BUT, I know that this home comes with a downside. Lots of problems in the school district and lots of neighborhood kids I don't want mine "hanging out" with. So, I began to think of moving a town over to the town in which I teach. While it is not perfect in any regard, it is much better than where we are now in terms of schooling. The fact that I am white and my children are black will be felt no matter where we move, but I do worry about that more in the town where I teach. However, thinking in long term, I want to be where we will be for quite a while so that J can start school with the kids she will continue with. The town we are currently in just doesn't hold up as a long term residence.

After some searching, we found what I believed to be the "perfect" house. A great neighborhood, the school district I wanted, room for even more kids in the future, etc. But, God had other plans and we didn't get it. Mine was now on the market, and sold very quickly to the second people to come through. So with an accepted offer in hand, I went searching once more. Not a whole lot where I wanted for the price I wanted, etc. But - God led me to a for sale by owner which I fell in love with. Almost everything is new, there is a good sized basement to finish as our family/play room, and while there are only two bedrooms, there is a huge attic "loft" that will be my room. As kids get older, I can let them live up there while I take a smaller room on the first floor. It's small, but so much character, a huge backyard and patio, near a great park, and by the river which has a nice bike/walking path. Only work to be done - taking off all the wallpaper!!! :) Glad to have my mom come help after school gets out. :)

So, as of last Friday, we now have an accepted offer on a new home of our own, and are looking forward (?) to moving April 28. Of course, as naturally happens, I will probably get a call for a new placement the week before! That would be ok though, I've been having the "itch" for bringing another child into our growing family!