Thursday, November 09, 2006


I forgot how much I really dislike (or should I say hate) bio parent visits. Maybe I blocked it out. I now am remembering things like when Braeden was given grapefruit juice at a supervised visit when he was like 3 months old. Who do you think was the one dealing with a sick child the rest of the day? Not the bio parents! Or when the current caseworker told the daycare she was just going to let him ride up front with her because he was cranky. Are you kidding???

Anyway, Little One had his first bio visits since being with me this week. He has one on Wednesdays with mom and one on Thursdays with dad. Crazy thing is, everyone pretty much knows he is not bio dad, but I guess it still has to be proven. Put it this way, you can clearly tell Little One is NOT made of the genes from this person.

Another thing: Who the heck schedules visits for an infant from 1:30-3:00 pm!!!??? Hello!!! Have you never heard of naps? A little thing called sleep? The fact that infants not only need 11 hours of sleep per night, but ALSO two naps!!!??? That is prime napping time!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!

And then you have the, what I consider to be "games" of the bio parent visits. Such as: Foster mom put him in this cute outfit, but I bought this one and am putting it on him myself right now. Come on! At least Little One's outfit fits the current season, though, I'll give them that! Braeden was put into shorts and a tshirt in the middle of the Arctic winter!

So, daycare provider and I are trying to get him an earlier afternoon nap on visit days, yeah right, and I am creating two bins: one labeled mom and the other dad. These will hold those lovely outfits he returns from visits in and will then be put right back on him the next week for the next visit. You want to see him in that? Fine. But do you really have to change his clothes simply for the reason of dressing him in YOUR outfit? I do understand they want to provide, but can't you just ask that he be sent in that next week. I am already tired of visits. We've had two.


Julie said...

I know- visits suck- if they want to give clothes that is WONDERFUL but like you said- I will put them in it next time. Fortunately or unfortunately I would say- I have not had parents who provide ANYTHING until very late in the game with my first placement. Then is was just a pair of shoes and a coupld stuffed animals. My current fd's bm has given a dress that is too small and a sleeper that fits. I haven't sent her to the visits in either one of those things but she rarely shows up anyway. She actually did today from what I hear so we will see if there is anything new when I pick her up.

Caseworkers really need to think about nap times!! they just don't think sometimes. :(

Susan said...

I talked with our girl's attorney about the nap issue and they now must schedule visits in the morning or late afternoon instead of at naptime. (hooray! small victory)
We also get interesting clothes at EVERY visit. About half the time they are not a size that would remotely fit her (try a size 3T dress on a 13 month old baby) and they are nearly always used and not laundered! If they are too big, I just send them back, but if they fit and I can make them work for the season, I send her to visits in them. Whe her worker came to observe a visit a few weeks ago she asked me if I needed more clothing allowance for the winter because baby girl was wearing a long sleeved shirt and babylegs under a sunsuit. I've told birth mom to keep her toys and bring them to each visit so she can play with them herslf with the baby (also interesting toys)

Post a Comment

Let's Connect!

Search This Blog


About Me

I am a single mom to four amazing kids; each of whom just happen to have been adopted. The first three were adopted through foster care, and we just completed an international adoption from Haiti. Our family has grown through adoption and I am all the more blessed to know each of my children. I worship a mighty God, teach Special Ed, love bargains, and am inspired by Pinterest... come along with us for the ride!

Olivia - 14

Olivia - 14

Braeden - 11

Braeden - 11

Liam - 9

Liam - 9

Macy - 5

Macy - 5

Check out my Teachers Pay Teachers store!

Blog Archive

What you should know about HIV

-HIV can NOT be spread through casual/household contact. HIV is not spread through hugging, kissing, shaking hands, sharing toys, sneezing, coughing, sharing food, sharing drinks, bathing, swimming or any other casual way. It has been proven that HIV and AIDS can only be spread through sexual contact, birth, breastfeeding and blood to blood contact (such as sharing needles). - HIV is now considered a chronic but manageable disease. With treatment, people who are HIV+ can live indefinitely without developing AIDS and can live long and full lives. - People who are HIV+ deserve to be treated with love, respect, support and acceptance as all people do. Additional information on transmission of HIV can be found on the Center for Disease Control website:

Other Awesome Blogs

Orphan Crisis

• 147 million orphans in the world
• 50 million orphans in Africa 
• Every 14 seconds a child is orphaned by AIDS
• 16,000,000 have been orphaned by AIDS
• Every week, AIDS claims as many lives as American fatalities in the Vietnam War
• 854 million people do not have enough to eat
• Malnutrition is associated with the deaths of 5 million children under the age of five
• Every 2 seconds an orphan dies from malnutrition

Hence the title of my blog

Little Did I Know

Little did I know that the road would be so rocky
Little did I know that the trip would take so long
Little did I know that my heart could hurt so much
Little did I know that God is never wrong

Little did I know that love could be so powerful
Little did I know that a dream so far could go
Little did I know that God would place the right ones
Little did I know that my heart, so large, could grow

Little did I know that a dream has it’s own timing
Little did I know that this day would finally come
Little did I know that four souls would be sent to guide me
Little did I know that they would choose to call me mom

But God knew all along and He had a plan to follow
God knew all along that my dream would soon come true
God knew all along that we five should be together
God knew all along that I’d share it all with you